Woman Warrior Wednesdays #5 by Kate Krimson

Lady Deadpool (“The Revolution will not be Televised”)-Marvel-$3.99


2 out of 5 stars


Summary:


Lady Deadpool/Wanda Wilson makes herself one hell of a greasy sandwich that looks so artery-clogging that even McDonalds wouldn’t serve it, while watching a cooking show that sounds like a parody of Paula Deen. When the cable goes out, Lady Deadpool decides to finally leave the house.


Meanwhile, Shosanna Einhorn, a journalist and heiress, talks with Arnold Prior, a retired admiral and U.S. Senator. Their conversation is a bit hard to follow, but it doesn’t matter because they are interrupted by Tristan Sheen, the founder of Bajillion Squillion Corporation, the current Cybersecurity Czar and the former CEO of Number Corp. He’s really rude to Shosanna and then Captain America shows up out of nowhere to help Tristan with a little project.


When Lady Deadpool enters the streets, it would appear that anarchy has taken over. Lady Deadpool decides not to focus on the chaos, but on Charles Randolph, actor/revolutionary leader, instead. She thinks that he’s so attractive. Randolph is leading a revolution for change. While Randolph gives his speech and kisses babies, Shamus Onus talks to Lady Deadpool. He says that he’s been looking for her for 11 days and wants to hire her as a mercenary. She decides to blow him off. Then, she focuses back on Randolph. He invites Lady Deadpool to a demonstration. She shows up. After that, she basically becomes a Randolph Roadie as his career in political speaking grows. . At one event, a man, who claims his wife left him for Randolph, throws a shoe at him. Lady Deadpool blocks it and the shoe knocks out a few of her teeth. Then, she shoots the guy.


Tristan has both Captain America and Sloane, Randolph’s girlfriend, working with him to take down Randolph. Lady Deadpool breaks into Randolph’s home to kill Sloane, because she wants to be the only woman in Randolph’s life. Captain America shows up and takes Randolph to a terrorist detainee center. Sloane tasers Lady Deadpool. Tristan visits Randolph in his cell. It turns out that Randolph is Tristan’s nephew, who is only good looking thanks to Tristan getting him plastic surgery.


Lady Deadpool gets info from Onus on Randolph’s whereabouts. She saves Randolph and slaughters at least four guards. Captain America shows up and fights her. She stabs him and he falls down. Tristan shows up, but Randolph chops off a piece of his head with nunchucks. Randolph is injured by a bullet leaping from Tristan’s gun. As Randolph starts to die, Lady Deadpool leans in for one last kiss for her dead decaying mouth.


Writer (Mary H.K. Choi): The story seemed a little lacking in details. Why was Tristan out to get Randolph? Why was Captain America willing to help this seemingly-evil guy? What exactly did Shosanna and Arnold have to do with the story? Half the time you won’t even know what’s going on. I’m sure my summary is hard to follow, but so was the comic. Also, I didn’t like how Lady Deadpool is more about falling love with cute guys than kicking ass.


Illustrator (Ken Lashley): The drawing, unlike the writing, was pretty good, especially the close-ups. The first close-up is on her killer sandwich, which oozes of death with greasy cheesiness seeping out the side and with Lady Deadpool’s big knife leaning in to cut it in half. The last close-up, which is fairly mortifying, is of Lady Deadpool getting ready for her big kiss. You don’t realize how wrinkly and warty her mouth is until you reach that close-up and you’ll probably wish you hadn’t.


Cover (Greg Land): Land’s cover for Lady Deadpool seems to capture her perfectly. It captures her soft side by showing her holding a teddy bear, her tough side by showing an arm and a pizza box with knives in them, and her couch potato side with her on the couch watching TV and eating pizza.